Sobbing is an excellent way of reducing symptoms associated with anxiety (and anger). Then again, so is laughter, cardiovascuuar exercise and anything that stimulates the release of the neurotransmitters dopamine and serotonin. I suppose I'm saying that release can come in many forms and I would advise you not to limit yourself to one particular form of release.

Do whatever works for you, and leave the rest.

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I'm new on this forum so I hope I am not too late for this post...

In my experience, having difficulty crying often comes down to a belief that you are not going to be heard or appreciated, or a judgement about crying, being 'weak' or 'girly' or something (funny enough, a lot of women have the subconscious belief that it is bad to be a woman and so it is bad to cry). That might not be what is going on in your case Liz, but I have found that that is the most common cases.

So affirm for yourself that it is ok to cry, and you will be heard and appreciated, that might help.

As far as getting the thing going, here are two ways. One is lie down and close your eyes. put your hand on your heart and imagine a little person in there. Open your mouth and let out a sound like 'aaaahhh', but mentally connect it to the little person in your heart, so it seems like that person, or your heart itself, is making the 'aaaahhh' sound. Do this straight for about half an hour, concentrating on your heart and how your heart feels finally being able to express itself. This is an extraordinary exercise even if you don't end up crying, but you probably will end up crying after a while. When you do, feel how good it is to finally cry and let it out all the way.

If that doesn't work, this is a bit more heavy duty. Lie down, again with your eyes closed. Have a rolled up towel handy. Put your hand on the top of your chest, just where your collarbones meet. Breathe in and out with no pause between the inhale and exhale, making sure that your hand on the top of your chest is rising up and down. Really nail it hard, like you have just sprinted a marathon. You will start to first laugh then fill up with anger and sadness so much it is almost painful. When it gets to that stage, put the rolled up towel in your mouth and scream (whatever nasty phrase you can think of. Scream until it all blasts out, then go for another round. Doing this will also get rid of a lot of stuff, but you will most likely end up crying as that is easier.

I hope that helps.

Dave.

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The Lib/con coalition are still in power and ripping the heart out of a community near you - certainly makes me weep.

Seriously, though, a bit of "here and now" can go a very long way to relieving symptoms of distress, didn't mean to sound flippant.

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Close to it for me too mate

Hopefully we will have a good solution to it soon....

Anyway - about the question as to how I have come to believe that many women have the subconscious belief that it is bad to be a woman and therefore bad to cry - I have come to that understanding from working with a number of women on the issue, and seeing their lives change dramatically after helping them to realise they have the belief, and then helping them heal it.

Interesting thing is, that when they are first presented with the idea, they don't often believe it at first. It can be difficult for people to realise that their subconscious beliefs are completely different from what they consciously think, yet still create everything in their lives. So when they do accept the possibility that somewhere in their subconscious they have this belief lurking around that it is bad to be a woman, etc, they then find it is indeed there, and so they can heal it.

I have seen more than one woman heal from polycystic ovary syndrome when I have helped them uncover that belief system and heal it. That's not to mention other problems I have seen heal with the healing of this belief system, such as high testosterone levels resulting in acne and too much facial hair, etc.

At first I thought it was a minority of women who had this belief - those which had problems like PCOS and high testosterone levels, etc. But when you work on a belief system enough times, you start to pick up evidence for it when listening to how people speak and act and react to things. From there I started to see that the belief is quite common in women, even if it doesn't always result in physical illnesses. It can result in other things, and having difficulty crying is a common one.

I hope that helps. Thanks for the question.

Dave.

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I am a clinical hypnotherapist, and sometimes a subject starts to cry for no apparent reason. They nearly all intuitively reason afterwards that it was due to a build up of something. So maybe you should try hypnotherapy, even just a short relaxation session.

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Co-counselling International works for me. It trains you to be both a counsellor and a client. You can then work for free with anyone else who has done the training for nothing. You decide between yourselves how long a session is for and then divide the time equally between you e.g. half an hour as a counsellor and half an hour as the client. There is an emphasis on releasing feelings, reflection, action planning and celebration. For more info go to http://www.co-counselling.org.uk/

Alternatively perhaps music and lyrics would set off your tears. Check out my website at www.inspirationjukebox.com . This has famous and lesser known songs (with words) on topics such as 'free to be me', 'hear my pain', 'keeping going', 'let it be' and 'positive thinking'. Depending on what your tears are about, something might spark them off.

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